7 Executive Function Myths That Need to Die (Like, Yesterday)

You know what’s genuinely exhausting? The endless stream of productivity advice that assumes your brain works like everyone else’s. Spoiler alert: if you’re neurodivergent, it absolutely doesn’t. And these myths about executive function keep circulating because neurotypical people wrote all the rules, and we’re somehow supposed to just squeeze ourselves into systems that were never built for us in the first place.

So let’s burn some of these myths down, shall we?

📌 Pin this for the next time someone tells you to "just try harder."

myth 1: “you just need better time management skills”

Here’s the thing nobody tells you about time blindness — it’s not a skill issue. It’s literally how your brain processes (or doesn’t process) time passing. You can’t “manage” something you can’t accurately perceive, which is why all those cute time management courses make you want to throw your laptop out a window.

Your brain needs external scaffolding. Visual timers that show time disappearing (not just numbers counting down), body doubling so someone else’s presence creates temporal structure, time anchors where you link tasks to concrete events like meals or your kid’s nap schedule. These aren’t crutches you need to eventually outgrow — they’re accommodations your brain actually requires to function. Stop fighting it bestie.

And yes, this includes using tools like AI to help manage your time and tasks when your brain can’t. (Here’s how I actually use ChatGPT to survive mom life when executive function has fully left the chat.)

myth 2: “if it’s important enough, you’ll remember it”

Okay so working memory limitations mean crucial information just evaporates the absolute second you get distracted. Importance has literally nothing to do with it. You can be intensely aware that you need to call the pediatrician, genuinely care about calling the pediatrician, and then your brain just deletes that entire task the moment your kid needs something or a notification pops up.

If you don’t have a system to capture things immediately, like the second they enter your brain — they’re gone. Voice memos while you’re thinking about it, brain dumps into your notes app, capture systems you’ll actually check later. Whatever gets the information out of your head and into somewhere external counts. Girl, your working memory is already full, stop trying to use it as storage.

myth 3: “just break tasks into smaller steps”

Sometimes the problem isn’t that the task is too big. Sometimes you’re experiencing task initiation paralysis, and breaking one impossible task into 47 impossible micro-steps just gives you 47 things you still can’t start. This advice assumes the issue is task size when the actual issue is your brain won’t produce the activation energy needed to begin.

What you need are activation energy tricks. The 2-minute rule where you commit to literally just two minutes. Body doubling where someone else working nearby somehow makes your brain go “oh we’re doing tasks now.” Pairing the dreaded task with a dopamine hit like your favorite podcast. Or sometimes just doing something, anything, adjacent to the actual task until momentum accidentally kicks in. The goal isn’t perfect planning, it’s tricking your brain into motion.

myth 4: “you’re just not trying hard enough”

Executive dysfunction is NOT a motivation problem, and this myth absolutely needs to die in a fire. You desperately want to do the thing. Your brain just isn’t producing the neurochemicals needed to bridge the gap between “I know I need to do this” and “my body is actually doing this.” It’s just neurobiology, not moral failure.

Effort looks completely different for ND brains. You’re burning probably 10x the mental energy just to start what other people do on autopilot without even thinking about it. The problem isn’t your effort level — it’s that nobody can see the absolutely massive amount of invisible cognitive work you’re doing just to function at baseline. Your brain is literally processing more information and managing more cognitive load than neurotypical brains, even on days that look “easy” from the outside. When people say you’re not trying hard enough, what they mean is they can’t see your effort, which is a them problem not a you problem.

myth 5: “multitasking makes you more efficient”

For ND brains, task-switching costs are brutal. Every single time you switch between tasks, you’re draining your cognitive load budget, and you don’t get that energy back. Your brain needs time to fully disengage from the previous task, load up all the context for the new task, and actually get momentum going again. Multiply that by switching tasks every few minutes all day long and you’re basically running on empty by noon.

Batch similar tasks together when you can. Protect your hyperfocus when it actually shows up instead of interrupting yourself because you “should” be doing something else. Give yourself permission to monotask without guilt. One thing actually finished beats five things perpetually half-started and taking up mental space.

myth 6: “organization systems work if you just stick to them”

Most organization systems assume you have consistent executive function available. When yours fluctuates wildly depending on stress levels, hormones, sleep quality, sensory input, and approximately 82 other variables, rigidity absolutely kills the system. You have good brain days where you can maintain complex systems, and bad brain days where opening the app feels impossible.

Your systems need to work for your worst brain days, not your best ones. Low-barrier systems where starting is easy. Visible storage so you can actually see what you have without opening drawers. “Good enough” organizing that you’ll actually maintain beats perfect systems you abandon after three days. If your system requires consistent executive function to use, it’s not going to work long-term bb. Build for realistic you, not aspirational you.

Need help figuring out what tools actually work? Here are 70 ways to use AI as your external brain when yours isn’t cooperating.

myth 7: “everyone struggles with this sometimes”

Yes, everyone forgets things occasionally. Everyone procrastinates sometimes. Everyone feels overwhelmed. But minimizing executive dysfunction as “just being human” completely erases the actual neurological differences at play. Not everyone experiences executive paralysis so severe that showering feels like climbing Everest. Not everyone loses entire hours to getting stuck between tasks.

Frequency, intensity, and life impact matter here. If executive dysfunction is regularly fucking up your ability to function like missing appointments, forgetting to eat, unable to start basic tasks, drowning in decision fatigue — that’s not “normal scattered behavior.” That’s a real neurological thing that deserves real accommodations and support. (And no, what you’re experiencing isn’t “just mom brain” — it’s actual cognitive overload that works differently for ND brains.) You’re not being dramatic, you’re describing your actual experience.

These myths persist because they let society avoid building accessible systems. They make executive dysfunction sound like a personal failing instead of a neurological difference that needs actual support. But there's nothing wrong for needing different approaches. Your brain just needs what it needs — and that’s literally okay. It’s neurobiology bbg.

Now go half-ass something without guilt. Seriously. Give yourself permission ♡